Computer-User Problem-Form

Please describe the problem:

Now describe the problem without annoying comments:

Here you can widely speculate, what the crux of the matter is:

How important is the problem?

A matter of life and deathExtremely important

Unbelievably importantUltimately important

How important is the problem?

Not importantNot important at all

So not importantCan go to the bottom of the pile

Type of problem

I havn't got a clueThe computer is not working

It has crashedIt just doesn't work

I never really had a clueIt smells funny

Is the computer plugged in?

YesNo

Is the computer switched on?

YesNo

The screen too?

YesNo

Have you tried to solve the problem yourself?

YesKind of

Did that make it worse?

Yes 

Has a colleague, who "knows all about computers" tried to solve the problem?

YesNo

Did that make it even worse?

Yes 

Have you read the manual?

SureYes

Be honest. Did you really read the manual?

MaybeNo

Yes, the cover 

Are you absolutely sure that you read the manual?

No, but my colleague did ... 

In case you really did read the manual, did you understand it?

YesNo

If so, please explain why you could not solve the problem yourself

What were you doing when the problem occurred?

If you answered "nothing", please explain why the computer is switched on.

Does the display of your VCR show a flashing 12:00?

YesNo

If yes, what is a VCR?

Do you have an impartial witness for your problem?

Is the computer on fire?

YesNot yet ...

Do you have any electronic appliances at all that work fine?

No 

Is there anyone you can blame for this problem if it turns out that you caused the problem?

SureDamm it, no

If your answer is "No": Are you sure that you are not just imagining the problem?

NoNow you come to mention it ...

Did you give the computer a good bashing

YesNot in the last 3 minutes

Do you trust the capabilities of your IT experts?

No 

Why are you completing this form ????

And, finally, the most important question: Are you a woman?

YesNo

Sometimes